Boogie Phone

Welcome to Boogie Phone, home of all the bad habits of modern-day smart phone culture and over use. #BewareOfBoogie

Intro - Age of Boogie

Boogie Phone is your new (and only) best friend

By Campfire Park

Who is the Boogie Phone?

He's your new best friend.

Boogie is waiting

Correction, he's your only friend, or that's what he aspires to be. Or perhaps more correctly, think of Boogie as the new Boogie Man -- only instead of lurking around a corner at night, he's right there with you every day of your existence in the palm of your hand. That's right, if Boogie has his way, he caters to all your worst impulses.

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Inalienable rights of Boogie

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The Boogie Phone is not only …

Your new freedom machine:

Boogie has a growing list of rights

He’s your best friend, and soon to be only friend … at least that’s his hope. And more than that, as a user of a Boogie Phone you should be aware: Boogie has a growing and ever demanding list of inalienable rights. For one, you should never leave home without Boogie. Never! Period and end of discussion. Oh, and when you’re home. He prefers to be in one of three places: In your hand, in you pocket, or safely stowed on the most prominent place on your counter, and plugged in. (Boogie hates a low charge. More than hate — being properly charged is his right). To find out more about your obligations to Boogie, go to menu -> appearances -> small print -> very small print -> boogie phone agreement where you’ll be prompted to enter your Boogie passcode.

As always, Boogie says thanks in advance.

Boogie Phone Pop Quiz
Test your phone knowledge

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Yes, we all have phones …

But are you using yours correctly?

Take Test Now

  1. When is it appropriate to giddily text back and forth with someone? a. While driving on a multi-lane highway b. In a meeting (as long as you pretend it’s “important business”) c. While someone else is trying to talk to you “in person” d. At the dinner table with your family e. All the above
  2. How often should you check your newsfeed? a. About every hour, so long as it’s a slow news day b. Whenever you pick up your phone c. Multiple times per hour d. Whenever you’re bored or unmotivated to do something else e. All of the above
  3. What’s your least favorite thing to do with your phone? a. Take a selfie b. Talk to a person c. Social media d. Contribute to Big Data e. Google search
  4. When should you not have your phone? a. Never b. At the dinner table c. While sleeping d. While exercising e. While swimming in the ocean

See answer key at the bottom

And remember, proper phone usage is a key to a happy and healthy life. That means putting the phone first (and sometimes even second) and everything else third, if not even fourth.

This public service announcement is brought to you by:

Answer Key 1e, 2e, 3b, 4a

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