Burt Silver

My name is Candidate Burt Silver. Whether it’s pulling in my earnings around the card table in the late-night smokey boiler room or serving my constituents, I get the job done. “It’s a new dawn with Burt Silver … because I stayed up all night to see it.” | Before Phones Movement | Our supporters | Our adversaries | Main campfire

Intro - Smokey boiler paradise

Candidate Burt Silver gets the job done

By Campfire Park

The smokey boiler room ...

Has been good to Candidate Burt Silver.

Intro to Burt

Part sanctuary part lucrative side gig, most of all the smokey boiler room is where Burt is able to get the job done, relax at what he enjoys doing most (gambling and smoking), and pull in the crazy gambling earnings that pays for all his campaign ads. Burt's campaign slogan: "It's a New Dawn with Burt Silver, because he stayed up all night to see it."

Burt's recent campaining

Major Water Speech

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When is it a good time …

To talk about water?

Burt’s water speech

Answer: Probably at any point during a campaign, or after it for that matter, too. To quote a close friend, water will always be on humanity’s Top 3 priority list. Family, peace, water. Maybe not in that order. In this epic speech, in true Burt fashion the candidate lays bare his passion for the substance at the same time he isn’t going to reveal his hand as to what may or may not be in his cup when he’s playing high stakes poker in the smokey boiler room at night. Why? If Burt understands anything in life, it’s how to play a hand, be it weak or strong. In his view, him revealing whether he’s drinking water or something else is akin to the most dreaded of card table (and/or negotiation) faux paus — a tell.

So you’ll just have to trust Burt when in comes to the water, or whatever’s he drinking.

Setting the record straight
Burt talks late night smokey boiler room

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There’s a lot of confusion …

Swirling around the “late night smokey boiler room.”

Burt discusses his record, proudly

Burt’s happy to talk his record, any time and anywhere

For a lot of people, there’s a knee-jerk reaction that it’s a waste of time, or even worse — a distraction from a productive life. Not for Candidate Burt Silver. The late night smokey boiler room is where he finds his sweet spot, and where he gets down to what he does best — pulling in lots of earnings, coming up with all his best ideas, and strapping on a late night feedbag at the all-night dinner afterwards. How late afterwards? Usually by the time Burt shows up at the late-night dinner, the dawn of a new day is starting to break. That’s actually how Burt came up with his campaign slogan: “It’s a new dawn with Burt Silver, because he stayed up all night to see it.” New Dawn is also the name of his campaign song, as sung by Bobby Angel.

The truth about Burt Silver is this: He gets the job done.